So my gang and I planned out a trip to Las Vegas. Seeing as it was going to be a first time experience, I was excited. Looking forward to seeing all that is Vegas, or try to.
So on the day off, I barely slept through the night. I had worked a 12-hour day shift and had to come home to commence with my packing. Yall know how we women do this, a 4-day trip and I packed like I was going to be there for 2 weeks. I woke up in the morning to leave my car at my friends place and then we Ubered to the airport. I could have Ubered by myself; however the increased incidents of crea crea individuals posing as Uber drivers worried me. So we leave on time... NOT.... someone couldnt find her keys. But we eventually leave and it must have been the tacos I had for lunch the previous day that did me in. Because I started to throw up and for a moment (only for a moment), I thought of cancelling the trip. Even with my partners concern of my condition at that point I figured, I would get over it. Which I did, I really think the alcohol consumption that took place whilst I was there, had something to do with it though....
So we arrive, check into our respective rooms. Nice, first night was a breeze we walked the streets of Las Vegas, watched all the different acts. This guy on a violin playing to hip hop got me.....awesome. We had dinner and hit the Kenyan shindig night scene, it was easy no drama, ubered back to our hotel. Lovely.
Come the next morning, we all agreed to meet up at the slots machine. So as I was walking towards my friends the next morning, this guy comes running towards me. By that time I had just got to where my friends were, he calls out for me. Excuse me, so I turn around.
Him: I just wanted to say hey
Me: Hey (as I turn around to talk to my friends)
Him: Excuse me
Him: I just wanted to get to know you
Me: (by this time I have a frown on my face) am sorry, what now?
Him: What are you doing later on tonight?
Me: (if you know me, you already know am losing my patience with this dude) Iâ€™ll be hanging out with my friends
Him: I just wanted to get to know you better, are you married?
Me : (I have more facial expressions than I know what to do with so by know he should have guessed that I wasnâ€™t interested.. or NOT) No, but I have a boyfriend.
Him: Oh so when are you breaking up with him?
Me: For what? You? (As I say this I give him the head to toe look, turn around and totally ignore him. Which should have been the first thing I did to begin with?)
So we hang out that day, the night wasnâ€™t all that pleasant. As we tried to hit the Kenyan scene, note to self. It gets to a certain age where getting in line to go see an artist I know nothing about it is just not in my cards. We head back to the hotel for a couple of night caps and finally I call it a night. Some hit the slot machine; I for one find it boring because I never win. And the last thing I want to be leaving behind is my moneyâ€¦.
So am walking to the escalators, then I see someone running towards me from my peripheral. I turn around thinking it was someone I know (I mean why else would anyone be running after a total stranger)â€¦
Him: Hey sasaâ€¦
Me: (im a little tipsy, either that or I just chose to not hear what he had to say) Am sorry???
Him: Sema (at this point and time I have decided to feign a lack of knowledge in Swahiliâ€¦.
Me: What you say knowâ€¦.. (so know am irritated, what in Gods name is wrong with these Kenyan men, they see a female who resembles a Kenyan female and we are all up for grabs or what is it)
Him: Ulikuwa unaenda kulala??
Me: (thinking in my headâ€¦.ofcourse not, I was heading up my hotel room at 0200 hours to go for a swim)â€¦. What do you want??
Him: Nilikuwa nataka kukusindikisha kwa room yako tukajuaneâ€¦
Me: (Do you notice how up until now this guy has not caught on to the fact that I only respond in English. So I really wanna curse this moron outâ€¦ Lawd help me) what is it man? (Am told that, I sometimes come across with an Akata accent. And yes at certain points and time I to choose to go that route. Hey itâ€™s not my fault I can switch it off and on)
Him: Oh am sorry I thought you were Kenyanâ€¦
Me: (I just turn around and walk away)
Seriously since when was it ok for most Kenyan men, to lack such respect for Kenyan women. Donâ€™t get me wrong I understand that it is a 2 sided coin. Because ladies a man will only get away with as much as you let him. And Iâ€™ll be damned if I get disrespected because most of us Kenyan women are willing to be treated in such a disgusting mannerâ€¦..
By Day 3, its official I want nothing to do with anything that is Kenyan for the rest of my stay in Vegas, if I donâ€™t know you keep it moving.
As usual our routine is to go out during the day and tour the city. So evening comes and am ready to step out and have some fun, experience Las Vegas at night. So we all dress up, hit the night spots. Have a ball and come back home, no drama at all. We get back and because we, the ladies were not sleepy we decided to hit the slot machines and hang out and just talk.
Yâ€™all know how it goes my feet were on fire, the walking we had been doing during the day and the stiletto at night was killing my feet. So I took them offâ€¦â€¦ we were at the 1c slots as usual.
This guy walks by us and asks
Him: Mangapi, madame leo usiku? (First things first that slang is so old I understand it)
Me: (by now I have just about had enough of this bs) What the â€œfâ€ did you say?
Him: (turns out there were some Kenyan ladies seated at the next slot machines and they burst out laughing. So I guess the man wanted to save face and regain his manhood. So he turns around and comes for me)
Me: (donâ€™t you know you donâ€™t come for me, unless I call for you. So I see him coming and I stand up off the chairâ€¦â€¦.darn it. I had taken my shoes off, so he stands taller than me. Am pissed off right now, you insulted us then because some females laughed at you, you thought you could intimidate me with you presence. Honey try again, I donâ€™t intimidate that easy. So am going off at this time, my friend is busy telling the guy that I am Akataâ€¦â€¦ and donâ€™t give a fuck. At that moment, I didnâ€™t really give a damn. And if the cops were to roll up guess what I was cool with that after all, there were cameras all around us. So am still hollering at this moronâ€¦.. I guess he finally realized I wasnâ€™t going to stop. And I truly sounded and acted like an Akata and he would probably be the loser and he walked awayâ€¦â€¦.
So heres my question. When did it become okay for these Kenyan men to talk to us in this manner, address us in this way, and disrespect us like they do? Then turn around and give another female from a different race and nationality more respect than they give us? Yet the same Kenyan men have Kenyan sisters, friends, mothers, cousins, aunties.
Am perturbed, I donâ€™t get it.
But I see it, when we have some of us women throw ourselves at these men under the guise of, I was drunkâ€¦
Stand by and say nothing when we see them disrespect another woman in our presenceâ€¦.
Laugh with them as they act like Neanderthals, cat calling women (then again I think they acted way better) or even have the audacity to hit on a man surrounded by other women in a group, with the intention of distracting the women the man is with as her friend reels in the prey (prey being the man who actually has a girlfriend right there).
If we donâ€™t even respect ourselves as Kenyan women, how do we expect the men to respect us? We make it hard for the women who actually have scruples, respect, decency and pride.
These women who sit at the bar from dusk to dawn and think its cool, so drunk you barely can walk. Trying to attract all these men, who all they want to do is, use you and dump your nasty behind; I donâ€™t understand why you would let a man who would go around hitting on anything in a skirt any where near your poom poom.
I just donâ€™t get itâ€¦
I finally understand what the term â€œTeam Mafisiâ€ applies toâ€¦.
Clearly the Kenyan Vegas experience has a different meaning from what I thought it would be. Am I disappointed? Yes I am. I would be lying if I said I wasnâ€™t. I now equate 80% of the Kenyan Vegas rugby competitions to a â€œFuck Festâ€ where most people go under the guise of the game during the day and at night, it turns into a jungle where both species go hunting whether you are married, engaged or single. Itâ€™s a free for all.
By Belinda Adhiambo