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Kiambu Woman Representative Gathoni Wamuchomba has called on rich Kikuyu men to marry many wives. The former journalist argues that the practice will help stem the number of children being born out of wedlock.
She says that the community's men who have sired children outside their marriages should consider adopting the concubines as their wives since the Kikuyu culture allows for polygamy.
Ms Wamuchomba said that some of the societal problems in modern day, including alcoholism among young people can largely be blamed on raising up children in the absence of their fathers. “We give birth to these children, and we do not want to own up to them…I am saying, if you are a man from the Kikuyu community, and you can sustain five wives, have them and if you are a man and you are in a position to bring up (many children), do it,” she said.
She says revisiting polygamy could be a solution to the vices since some of the social problems affecting youth are attributed to poor parenting.
Ms Wamuchomba was speaking at a Violence Recovery Centre at Wangunyu in Karura, Kiambaa Sub-County on Monday.
“We need to be honest, these children who are raised by single mothers, where are there fathers? And why do we want to pretend that this is not a problem. For me, as much as we are talking about our church and our culture, we need to go back to the drawing board to discuss this issue and come up with a solution,” said Wamuchomba.
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Such a narrow minded bigot
Let the insults start flying, but I think Wamuchomba is on to something. Note she said rich kikuyu men....
RICH Kikuyu men marry Poor Kikuyu women; POOR Kikuyu men aka Gold Diggers marry Other Tribes' Educated/Rich women.
I am a Kyuk and have been harassed quite a lot lately in Kenya especially by elderly cucus for having only two kids. They think I am very selfish. Just four weeks ago, I was at a family function in Kiambu and the elderly women were not letting it go. Sadly, they simply don't want to hear of the reasons why the new generation chooses to have less kids. My pet peeve is when I am told "a kid comes to this world with his/her own food bowl." Unfortunately, you have to sit there and just take it because I don't want to be accused of being rude especially to the elderly.
Mama, being rich is relative.And might I remind you that raising children entails more than finances.Secondly, are these single mothers getting impregnated by "unworthy" husbands? If so then you cannot blame the men.
I see that you are conveniently single,but going by your liberal thoughts, I would imagine that you are someone's pango wa kando.
Thirdly,what do you tell those who follow son of Mariam(as Mkenya Halisi puts it)on this matter of having numerous wives?
Lastly, why are you making an assumption that these single mothers need husbands.Could it be a new trend that you just have not embraced?
While I generally agree with Wamucombas point of view, I would like further this discussion by asking or adding a few ideas.
First, God calls us all to happiness. If polygamy would bring happiness to a family, then we African Christians need not be shy about this value from our traditional cultures. Those Christian Churches that bless and pray for gay and lesbian couples in their churches do so believing its not for humans but God judges appropriateness of such loving couples.
So if its right for other cultures to incorporate their values into their faith, why would we in Africa run away from what could potentially be the solution to the moral breakdown in our ciltures instead of embracing it?
Are we sure that God is against Polygamy? Where is it written in both Old and New Testament that God is against polygamy. On the contrary, the old testament has numerous passages in support..NT is not very explicit about this. It tells us that a man and a woman become not two but one body. Gods math is not like our own...so if two can be one, why wouldn't three or four be one if done in love?
Finally, for cultural and social reasons, we need to rethink our Christianity as Wamucomba says. We need to think outside the box. Only those called to this life should enter this..I slightly disagree with Wamucomba that only the rich should marry more than one wife. I would argue that though financial stability would make life livable for all in such families, wealth comes second to love. Love must be supreme..if the wives are ready to love the man and remain faithful, and if the man is ready to share his love equally to all and remain faithful to them, then lets wish such couples well.
If remaining happily single is a calling, or marrying one wife is also a calling, I believe polygamy too is a calling. Its not for all men but only for those ready to become good role models.
@Miki, polygamy is hell on Earth. It is made up of US vs. THEM. Legitimate vs. illegitimate, all the children who are not born by the first wife are considered illegitimate. It is a fertile land for jealousy & hate. When the man dies the fight kicks in on how to share the properties/wealth. No human being can love two or three wives equally. Hell no to polygamy
Kenya,you are right Polygamy can be hell on earth.But it was never hell in the beginning.But since we are not going back to hunter gatherer days,monogamy would suffice.
Those who are clamoring for polygamy are just trying to hold on to vestiges of past era. On this topic,I have said before that for me one wife is a handful.I cannot fathom more than that.And those who have more than one, Iwould like to ask them,is it necessary,in today's world.Same question goes to wives of a polygamist.Iam sure we have some on Mwakilishi forum. Let's here from the horses mouth...
I couldn’t have said it better, Miki. Let’s not be modern day Pharisees; who can better interpret the Bible better than anyone else. There’s plenty of polygamy in the good book in fact. On the other hand, a lot of Kenyan men have “mipango” for days, we can continue to pretend it’s not the case or we can have a healthy debate on whether this is one of the aspects of our culture that we could return to. It seemed to have worked before. Maybe the drama we see this days at funerals is as a result of not having this practice in the mainstream, perhaps we can experience a correction...
@Miki, I take issue with your statement"God calls us all to happiness". How does He do that?Hard to be happy when an earthquake has destroyed your house,or alion mauls your loved one...Better yet a shamba boy being "happy" with your wife--you get the drift.Especially when we are led to believe that he has power to remove this"unhappy" causing agents...
I totally agree with Wamuchomba, those who are able should take more wives, wacheni hii uzungu.
@Maxiley, listen to her live: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=K_p_kmFYIzE. Note: I have kept mum on this hot potato. Ata as a lone mother, from the rags, etc.... in this area I say, changu ni changu, chako, chako..... Being a lone mother is not a disability just a cultural stigma originating from these practices of wake wengi.
Unbeliavable.Our forefathers did many things we do not do nowdays.What a shallow reasoning ,that they did no harm by being polygamous...Common sense would dictate that we dont want to go back to ridding donkeys and fetching water 19 miles from ariver,or use mitishamba for abroken leg...
Correct @maxiley, our forefathers did not pay school fees or buy clothes & shoes. Education was not required in those days and people did not have more than 2 clothes. Shoes did not exists. Wamuchomba wants us to go back to those days.
@Kenya,Iwould like her to lead the way by first wearing only apiece of leopard skin this Friday since wananchi have been"mandated"to wear african atire on that day of the week. She should also discard all her hygine products such as tampads and opt for the way her great grandmother took care of her monthly periods...This mama should be ashamed to be called a leader.Leaders should lead people foward,not backwards.It is always unfair to think that Africans who lived 200 years ago were better off than modern africans.Nobody really forces us to live the modern way...we know everything considered this modern way of living is better.
Yesterday's newspapers had great news for heroines-expired Madikizela Mandela and Gathoni Mucomba.I wish i knew her before she was married,singe muacha.I would be having a second or third wife now.Ongea ukweli Gathoni,wacha wapayuke.
hiyo ni ujinga! Women don't have to tolerate that ujinga of men marrying more than one wife. How about women getting married to more than one husband? Can the men be comfortable with that? Same concept so why don't we advocate for women to marry more than one husband? Wake up from your deep slumber Ms. Gathoni...Leta development sio unjinga kama what you are calling for.
The trouble with this debate and most debates such as this in social media, is that both sides of the camp often speak as though their side has all the answers. I wish we would all start from the humble place that non of us has all answers.
Neither those in support of Wamucombas view or those against it are right...virtue is in the middle...is it possible to debate and get to this middle instead of calling each other names
Kweli@ Miki. In any case, the reality on the ground will dictate what happens. If someone finds it more beneficial to be in a polygamous union, than say being a single parent or living with an addict, then they will do so as long as society does not punish them for making the choice. Mpango was kando is simply the same thing in a highly regulated society.
Wamuchomba you want HIV/AIDS to shift from Kisumu to Kiambu. Wamuchomba you want to become the lord of the funerals in Kiambu. Most Kiambu men cannot sire a baby because of what changaa, busaa, muratina has done to them. Try another formula