Former nominated senator Isaac Mwaura’s wife Nelius Mukami has opened up about her battle with depression.
Through a lengthy post on Facebook, Mukami disclosed that she is suffering from depression, anxiety, and attention deficit hyperactivity disorder (ADHD). She admitted that the condition has and continues to drain her as it requires a lot of effort to overcome.
“It takes so much effort just to avoid it and it still finds me even in my happiest of days and in my solitude,” she wrote.
Mukami, who tied the knot with Mwaura in June 2015, said the condition makes her feel broken and unworthy, coupled with pain and trauma.
“Some days even finding the strength to wake up in the morning and be functional is difficult but nobody understands that it takes everything in me just to drag myself out of bed. I try not to allow it to overcome me but it still finds a way in,” she adds.
The Posh & Pretty Events CEO further noted that sometimes she looks in the mirror and cannot “recognize who I am anymore.”
“I have big dreams and big plans and great ambition but I am always hesitant to publish an article, post a YouTube video, or even a simple photo. My anxiety always manages to convince me that the work is not good enough and that I am not good enough. It tells me that people will see me as a fraud and realize I am not as good as I think. I do not feel worthy of the compliments and the achievements,” she adds.
Mukami vowed not to allow depression to take away her joy, adding that she is focused on “who I am and who I want to be.”
“Every day that I live am grateful, every day that I get out of bed and take a shower even leave the house is a great win for me.”
She added: “I know deep down that I am not broken and I am worthy. I know there is still so much for me to conquer…I am not going to give up fighting for myself within my own mind. I will not let depression take my joy away. I will strive to shed off the weight of depression.”
Her life took a downward spiral after she lost two of her triplets in 2018.